March 21, 2007

Buzzword Bingo: Bald, Brazilian, Beaver, Britney, Bikini, Buffer

| | Comments (4)

paris_upskirt_1.jpgBuzzword Bingo perhaps needs to be an expanded column someday on Shake Well Before Use. In the meantime, the current trend is buzzing off the beaver. Sexoteric points to an article in Esquire about the 'psychosocial implications of disappearing pubic hair on women'. Well of course, you only need the next plucked out bingo ball to be B5... B as in Britney, 5.. for you to be jumping up at your table screaming "bingo! bingo! Britney!" as you plow over sneering old ladies to claim your prize, to know the answer to that question.

Stacey Grenrock Woods of Esquire says, "the new bareness is a trend instigated by porn and exploited by the media, because when those two get together, anything can happen. No one suffers much from an absence of pubic hair; its evolutionary function is thought to be as a buffer for intercourse. No one paid it much mind until a few years ago, when a roving band of waxers from Brazil came here and started taking all of our country's pubic hair. And now it's just out of control..."

Well, yes, when our beavers begin looking like the head of a pop singer's insanity, you can maybe say it lost its footing somewhere along the way. However, when was the last time anyone appreciated buffering? It was no fun back in the 90s, trying to listen to music via Real Player over the 52k modem, so it certainly shouldn't be anymore appreciated a decade later.


That was a beaver between Britney's legs? Looked like a raw Perdue chiken to me. Ew.

Britney cleans up least she used to. It's not that I mind her carrying a few extra pounds, especially after two kids. But she's behaving like a 16-year-old.

I'm up for a nice (inadvertent) beaver shot as much as any other red-blooded guy. But that was the least inspiring set of pictures I've seen in quite some time.

Girls like Britney who are propped up by a team of stylists should be given the opportunity to pose for Playboy by the age of 20, before they lose touch with themselves and go downhill as quickly as she has. After that, they should be made to keep their clothes on.

I do wish her well, though. She seems to be going thru a rough patch (pun intended).

Not to be mean, but britney spears pussy isn't even cute, I'm straight.. and it didn't turn me on even, it did not do a thing for me.

Leave a comment

(moderated for inappropriateness)